I Blame The Victory Van

by Texy
2008 May 25 at 8:24 pm

Just because I can, I’m choosing to blame Manny’s error on the creepy smiling Victory Van in Oakland’s left field. For that matter, I’m choosing to blame our random defensive miscues, on again-off again bats, weirdly crappy pitching and weekend sweep on that Van.

Vans should not smile at you. They should not stare at you with unblinking eyes that look like they belong to a dangerous stoner hobo. No, I don’t know if dangerous stoner hobos actually exist – but if they do, they’d have the same look on their faces as that Victory Van.

Forget the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse – when I see that Victory Van coming towards me, I’ll know it’s the end of days.

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5 Responses leave one →
  1. 2008 May 26 at 2:58 am

    I agree. This thing creeped me out as soon as I saw it. WE should be looking at the WALL, not the other way around.

    It’s creepy in a twilight-zone, clown, jack-in-the-box way.

    I should probably get some sleep.

  2. 2008 May 26 at 10:07 am
    jules permalink

    LOL…good point. It’s not even original–it reminds me of the Chevron cars.

  3. 2008 May 26 at 5:59 pm

    It reminds me of both scary clowns and the scary buses my summer camp used to use to bring us to the lake to go swimming that nearly killed me that one time.

    You know what scary + scary equals? 2scary.

  4. 2008 May 28 at 5:55 pm
    Twinkie permalink

    The van looks like it’s hitting him. So now we know two of the four horsemen of the Sox Apocalypse: the Victory Van and a moose on an ATV.

  5. 2008 June 1 at 12:33 am
    Lyndsay permalink

    what about that big EYE looking at Carlos Lee (don’t know what field?) posted over at umpbump? I’d have trouble focusing on fly balls with that thing staring at me.

    and Twinkie – I think Lugo might be the 3rd horseman of that Sox apocalypse (LOVE that analogy!)…that, or the plague-flu.