Slumpbusting... For Charity!

It gets so monotonous posting cute story after cute story around here - the sappy sweet stuff is all good and fine, but I think we're all adult enough to know that professional baseball ain't all sunshine and unicorns and hearts and flowers. Baseball players have a reputation to protect... and Kevin Youkilis is here to bring the focus back to what really matters: slumpbusting!

  For anyone out there lucky (sheltered?) enough not to know about slumpbusters, how about I let Mark Grace, the King of Slumpbusting, tell you all about it? From his 2003 interview on "Rome Is Burning":
A slumpbuster is when you have to take one for the team. It's finding the biggest, nastiest, fattest broad, and you put the wood to her to come out of your slump. Also known as 'jumping on a grenade for the team'.
All class, that one. If that's not enough background info for you, Curt Schilling also commented on the subject for Maxim magazine back when he played for the Dbacks:
That was premarriage Mark. [laughs] If you are struggling at some aspect of the game and you're a single guy, there's a way that players believe you can relieve the negative karma. You go out and fornicate with a woman who might be of less than appealing visual quality I guess is the way to put it. The key to slumpbusting is alcohol intake before the excursion.
So there you are.

Normally, taking down a slumpbuster isn't something to be proud of. But Youk has found a way to turn slumpbusting into dollars for the kiddies: he's coming out with a new sports energy drink that's going to be called SlumpBuster. Even better... there will be a special drink to be called "Youk's Signature" SlumpBuster -- and proceeds from that will go to his Hits For Kids charity. So now you can go out slumpbusting... for the children!

I enjoy the press release announcing the creation of this interesting new product- watching publicity flacks bend over backwards to try and make this sound anything less than dirty is hilarious. To wit:

Red Sox Gold Glove first baseman Kevin Youkilis has teamed up with California based MBSB Holdings, LLC to produce a new energy drink geared towards sports fans and athletes. SlumpBuster, a term widely recognized by athletes and fans, will be launched in the 1st quarter of '08 with hopes of being the official energy drink of locker rooms and stadium concession stands worldwide.

Get involved and be the first in your area to "Take Down a SlumpBuster".

Come on now, that press release ain't fooling ANYONE. I'm curious to see how the hip and happening MLB officials and front office types are going to react to this - because that crowd is totally known for being laid back about this sort of thing.

Big hat tip to Dan at Red Sox Monster for this.




Comments (38)

[ fc ] says:
on January 3, 2008 6:16 AM

Having trouble finding my sense of humor about this one.
Appalling.



[ Texas Gal ] says:
on January 3, 2008 7:00 AM

Makes me wonder whether stuff like this is run by the front office- either the Sox or MLB. And if yes, maybe someone needs to forward the link to Urban Dictionary to all front offices to clue them in.



[ Margaret ] says:
on January 3, 2008 7:27 AM

Dude... isn't he up for arbitration? You'd think if he was going to do something like this... I don't know. Not ideal timing if you ask me, but hey, what do I know?

Maybe I'm missing something. Maybe the front office thinks it's hilarious, and its actually a way of kissing up. Maybe.

PS--love the "dirty boys" tag...

PPS--Schilling actually used the word fornicate. Love it.



[ sshark ] says:
on January 3, 2008 9:25 AM

Is it an alcoholic beverage or a sports drink? If it is a beer, it's not funny. I think I may be able to find the humor if it is a sports drink.



[ fc ] says:
on January 3, 2008 10:22 AM

Sorry, not buying it.

I don't know - am I living in the land of sunshine and unicorns? What's said in the locker room is one thing, but is it too much to hope that a guy with so much spirit also have some tact and class?

This is a guy with, God help us, a bunch of really avid female fans, and the whole concept is so disrespectful. And, by now you guys know how I feel about Youk, but I can't resist the temptation to reference a little something about, ahem, glass houses and stones?



[ Margaret ] says:
on January 3, 2008 10:53 AM

So if it's a joke, it's classless and mean-spirited. If it's real, it's classless and mean-spirited. It really doesn't matter to me whether it is real or not.

I agree with fc-- I don't mind this stuff as long as it stays in the locker room. In fact, I might even laugh about it in very specific contexts. But having seen this guy do interviews, I really expected more of him.

You know, I also think about guys like Tek and Papi--there is no way in a million years they would do something like this--and I suspect there is no way they approve, either.

I am praying, PRAYING, that some group of numbskull Sox fetishist girls don't totally miss the joke and decide to start calling themselves "the slumpbusters".

(Anyone else think the money should go to Kapler's domestic violence prevention fund? I mean, lets not get the kids tangled up in this, plus it will in some very, very small way negate the misogyny.)



[ Meril ] says:
on January 3, 2008 11:49 AM

Looks like someone's being the conductor on the failbus of misogyny here.

My other comment, re the player practice and "ugly" girls: I recall seeing one of those "internet bumperstickers" stating "I've upped my standards; now, up yours." Something the fangirls should keep in mind, eh.



[ Meg ] says:
on January 3, 2008 12:17 PM

Oh wow. I definitely see why it's offensive. And for a kids charity? Yikes. Isn't his fiance, Enza, is the CEO of his charity too? Maybe it was marketed to them as an somewhat generic "baseball-oriented energy drink" without too much detail, since that concept would certianly SEEM harmless.

I can't wait till Barstool gets word of this.

And, among the many other things wrong with it, the can has pinstripes!



[ Suzanne ] says:
on January 3, 2008 1:32 PM

I think Margaret's point about girls missing the joke is well made. What a nightmare. Where is Enza in all of this? I love Youk but may have reclassify him as a real asshat if he doesn't distance himself from this fiasco.

For the love of all that's holy....the can says "take one down." Ick.



[ Liza ] says:
on January 3, 2008 3:40 PM

I can see why he thought it might be funny, and I do like the guy as much as the next Sox fan, but a note to Mr. Youkilis: there is a fine line between humorous and mean, and you just crossed it.

And the pinstripes would turn me off it, even if it was named something more, I don't know--nice. Say... "SlumpStopper." It doesn't have the same ring to it, but it has alliteration and it has class, too.

Margaret--he is up for arbitration. I hope this is something the Sox FO likes, because even though the drink is by far not the best thing Youk's ever done, he is a Sox farm system product, and we like the idea of him holding down the infield over there at first for a long, long time.



[ Piney61 ] says:
on January 3, 2008 3:45 PM

Because I have to say it even if I do somewhat like Youk.

I betcha it tastes like herpes and Ben Affleck's leftovers.

Disclaimer: I like Youk, but the joke was too good to pass up.



[ fc ] says:
on January 3, 2008 5:27 PM

Anyone want a #20 home jersey?



[ Margaret ] says:
on January 3, 2008 5:35 PM

You know, as disgusting as this is, I also think it is highly unlikely he did this out of malice. Also, people screw up.

Even me.

Occasionally.

Personally--and others may disagree--I don't have it in me to let this cloud my opinion of him as a player.

So, fc, if you're really offering, hey, I'll take it. I mean, heck...



[ sshark ] says:
on January 3, 2008 5:45 PM

Barstool already has a hold of it. Their take was that Youk was a slumpbuster for Enza...now THAT made me chuckle a bit. This whole marketing scheme....not producing chuckles, though. Makes me question his integrity. Can we hope that maybe this wasn't his idea, or is that too much to ask?



[ starr4 ] says:
on January 3, 2008 6:41 PM

This posting has bothered me all day. No matter how I toss it, this is a BAD idea. It's lousy for a children's charity to have to benefit from this missed-the-integrity mark marketing, one in pinstripes no less. It's lousy to have a wonderful player make such a tasteless mistake. Yeah, boys will be boys but I prefer my boys to possess respect for women.



[ fc ] says:
on January 3, 2008 8:19 PM

I'm gonna hold out on the jersey for now, along with the faint hope that someone can explain this away. Not sure when/if I'll be comfortable wearing it in public again though.



[ mouse ] says:
on January 3, 2008 9:09 PM

And to think some people scoff when I bring up the subject of sexism still being rampant in society.

I just lost a lot of respect for Youk, but I can forgive and forget provided this, um...[i]idea[/i] dies a quick death. Like Margaret said, I doubt this was done out of malice, but it's certainly in extremely poor taste from where I sit.



[ JoshRocks ] says:
on January 3, 2008 9:15 PM

I can't believe Youkilis would be this ignorant to name his drink this knowing what it meant.

Now if you know me you know I am not a Youkilis fan. (frankly his whining about the fans bothering him turned me off years ago) but I just can't see him being this ignorant.



[ Soxcruiser ] says:
on January 3, 2008 10:23 PM

I'm shocked and dismayed that that not only the name but the marketing of a can in pinstripes got by Kevin's agent and friends and family. I do belive that the players are only focused on playing but someone needs to be watching out for them. Maybe Kevin needs to rethink who is making decisions for him because this one is ugly and it isn't funny.



[ Linda ] says:
on January 4, 2008 6:27 AM

The term slump busters has been around since the dawn of sports. Long before Mark Grace dirtiied it up. Athletes have probably come up with a million and one ways to try to break out of a slump, most of which do not involve sex with an unattractive partner. This Urban Dictionary meaning is but one of many. I'm gussing the drink is named in the true spirit of a slump buster, not a dirty ballplayer's definition.



[ Margaret ] says:
on January 4, 2008 6:56 AM

As expected, Youk's team sent an email to the press, saying what you did, Linda--

http://news.bostonherald.com/track/inside_track/view.bg?articleid=1064506
“Unfortunately, like many common sayings, the ‘slumpbuster’ term can also be twisted to having negative connotations,” said Youk’s agent, Joe Bick of Pro Star Management, in an e-mail. “That would be incorrect in this particular case, and not something Kevin would condone or wish to be associated with. In this particular case, the term should be taken in only the traditional sports sense.”


Sorry, I don't buy that excuse. There's no way he had no knowledge of what this meant to the vast majority of the public, even if he intended otherwise...

I'm not a Maureen Dowd fan, but I finally read her column on this issue and really enjoyed it--it explains one dimension of my disapproval very well.
http://www.nytimes.com/2005/02/20/opinion/20dowd.html

The other dimension, of course, is from me as a female baseball fan--if players don't show respect for female fans, why should the male fans?



[ Meg ] says:
on January 4, 2008 6:56 AM

The term "slumpbuster" HAS been around for a long time, but there's other things about the drink that indicate it's not totally innocent...the back of the can has a pic of a "curvy" chick in a baseball jersey, and the "Take one down!" phrase is slang for, uh, "fornicate," as Schilling would say:-P.



[ Linda ] says:
on January 4, 2008 9:20 AM

I'm not sure that is a real picture of the can. Curious to know where the photo came from.



[ Texas Gal ] says:
on January 4, 2008 11:07 AM

A couple of things:

1. I never said Mark Grace invented it. But, Mark was really the first athlete silly/dumb enough to go on record (repeatedly) talking about it.

2. That is a real picture of the can- see here.

3. Of COURSE Youk's people are going to say that's not the meaning that was intended. But I don't buy that- because the press release was all "wink, wink" about it to begin with -- and once again used the "take down a slumpbuster" phrase.

Every single pro baseball player at any level knows EXACTLY what the term means - and they're not referring to wearing different socks or a rally cap. High school softball girls or little league baseball players may have latched on to the term's alternative, nicer meaning - but for pro ballplayers, you are kidding yourself if you think they don't all use it in exactly the way Mark Grace talked about.



[ Linda ] says:
on January 5, 2008 5:01 AM

I was actually wondering about the pic of the woman in the baseball jersey that Meg mentioned.

By the way, Texas Gal, your website is great!



[ Steve ] says:
on January 5, 2008 10:31 AM

First his agent says its not meat the way Grace meant it so why have a "woman" onthe can? Put some sort of made up sports logo on it.

I dothink some of the reaction is a bit over the top though. Is the #20 jersey pink by any chace?



[ Texas Gal ] says:
on January 5, 2008 12:48 PM

Linda: if you click to view more "Pics" on that SlumpBuster energy page I linked to, the girl on the reverse side of the can is pictured.

Also: SlumpBuster energy's hero is "Mark Grace". ENOUGH SAID. The curvy girl on the can + "Take One Down" emblazoned on the front + Mark Grace as a hero + the wink, wink press release = it's exactly what we all said it was. Youk trying to pretend otherwise is just silly.

Steve: Come on now- in the wake of this anti-female product hoopla, let's not go with a "pink hat" insult. Would you have said that to a guy who posted that comment?

But, yeah, fc I wouldn't let this ruin you being a fan of Youk. It's stupid and childish and silly and totally inappropriate- but hopefully not mean-spirited. It was not a well thought-out move by him, or his management team, and I think everyone is perfectly right to get upset at the misogynistic tones of the product- but everyone makes bone-headed mistakes. This was bone-headed deluxe, to be sure!



[ Steve ] says:
on January 5, 2008 5:23 PM

yea because any bandwagon jumper or fairweather fan, be it male or female, is pink...it's their color.



[ Texas Gal ] says:
on January 5, 2008 5:30 PM

I would shake the hand of any man who had the balls to wear a pink Red Sox jersey to a game.



[ Margaret ] says:
on January 5, 2008 6:42 PM

Amen, Tex (not to the hand-shaking one, to the one before that).

I do have to say... I don't think it is fair to say that any woman who loses some enthusiasm for Mr. Youkilis is necessarily a pink hat. I mean, you can disagree, but this was wrongdoing on his part, not theirs.

A fairweather fan would take off because Youk was unpopular, but I don't think the term applies when the fan is really let down by the player.

That being said, I've previously stated I would not let this cloud my judgment of him as a player, because as Tex said, everyone makes bone-headed mistakes.

Let the healing begin, my friends, let the healing begin.



[ fc ] says:
on January 5, 2008 9:26 PM

Well, this is fascinating. I check in and find I've sparked the most unlikeliest of debates.

This is offensive to me as a woman. It has nothing to do with bandwagon. And while Steve's snipe isn't really worthy of a reply, I can't resist the opportunity to tell him that the only pink was in the bad tint of my family's newfangled color TV when I cried over the World Series in 19......well, let's just say Yaz sends his regards.



[ fc ] says:
on January 5, 2008 9:29 PM

And BTW - what's the aversion to new fans? Without new fans, there would eventually be no fans.



[ Texas Gal ] says:
on January 5, 2008 9:32 PM

Pink is yucky because it's FOR GIRLS and girls are gross!



[ Texas Gal ] says:
on January 5, 2008 9:41 PM

And just so's we're clear: I hate pink team gear for anyone over the age of 14, not because it means the girl who wears it is a bandwagoner (because let's get serious: I have never heard a man referred to as a "pink hat" - it is a derisive term used to describe female fans) -- but because pink is not the team's color, and it looks ridiculous.

Although I do own one of those "B" logo camoflage tshirts from last year, so I guess I'm a hypocrite. A REDNECK HYPOCRITE. I don't wear it to games, though. I save it for moose hunting.



[ fc ] says:
on January 5, 2008 9:46 PM

Moose hunting - boo yah! Take one down! ;)



[ Texas Gal ] says:
on January 5, 2008 9:47 PM

It's the only way to bust a slump.



[ fc ] says:
on January 5, 2008 9:51 PM

Now that, species-ist carnivore that I am, I could respect.



[ Margaret ] says:
on January 6, 2008 4:47 PM

Count me in on the moose-hunting.

Also, fc, I'm with you, if the Sox never got new fans, they'd be in serious trouble.

But I also think there is a certain TYPE of new fan that is worthy of derision. Those who ignore either the actual sports component of sports fan living...

For example, I ran into a person who was complaining that the Sox hadn't won the World Series at home. I was on the very of apoplectic. New fans are welcome, but they need to have perspective, you know?

Now, for this moose-hunting trip, do they make bright orange Sox gear for safety? As a wise man once said: "Hunt and Live Safely--Teach the Children." I am sure that applies to slumpbusting (in any species, really).




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