Let's take a quick tally of the wild and wacky happenings last night at Fenway, shall we?

1st inning: Gametime begins early at 6:05, moved to accommodate Celtics game.
1st inning: Manny Ramirez launches homer #503, a three-run shot.
2nd inning: James Shields drills Coco Crisp; Coco charges the mound; basebrawl ensues.
2nd inning: In the aftermath, Coco, Shields and Jonny Gomes are all ejected.
2nd inning: Chris Carter makes his major league debut, replacing the ejected Coco.
4th inning: Jacoby Ellsbury makes spectacular diving catch, bends wrist backwards in a way God doesn't intend, leaves the game.
4th inning: Kevin Youkilis called in to play outfield.
5th inning: Manny and Youk get into a mini-brawl with each other in the dugout.
7th inning: Manny tweaks his hamstring while at-bat, leaves the game.
7th inning: Kevin Cash called in from the bullpen to pinch run for Manny.
9th inning: Red Sox complete sweep of Rays, go up 1.5 games in AL East.

Was it something in the water? Because that's a serious run of crazy stuff. Wait- there's something else to add to the list:

Pregame: Stephen King makes appearance, does interview on NESN in Sox ballcap.

This was no coincidence, people. It all makes sense now. That guy is the very definition of weird- it's no wonder Fenway was a strange place last night.