Everything is all wonky and turned-around. Up is down. Right is left. Black is white. Day is night. The baseball world for Sox fans feels just plain out-of-sorts.

The Sox were embarrassed in Tampa, but turned it around 180 degrees and win the first two against the Yankees in New York... only to then do an about face and drop the second two. The team held on to a sizable lead in the AL East throughout most of the season, despite a rough schedule, starting overseas, and numerous injuries.... only to fall apart in June, and fall to second place, 5 games back. To the RAYS. The freakin' DEVIL RAYS. I know, I know- they're the story of baseball so far, and have a ton of young talent, and phenomenal bats and pitching, etc. But they're still a team that didn't even exist over ten years ago, that can't even make up their mind what their mascot and name is, that hand out cowbells to "fans", and that have an honest-to-god aquarium in the outfield. That is just all kinds of wrong.

Just when we think we've sorted Julio "E6" Lugo out, and written him off entirely... he makes a spectacular catch or two, and a couple of hits. Not to mention, Lugo's OBP isn't the worst on the team, either- it's better than Cora, Ellsbury, Crisp. Cash... and Varitek. Don't get me wrong: Lugo's still laying up goose eggs instead of hits with regularity, and he's a long ways from an OPS and defense that warrants his salary-- but he's not even close to being the biggest liability in the lineup. And on the flip side, the bullpen went from the Lights-Out Heroes of '07... to the Nightmare Fuel of '08. Remember back when games would reach the 7th or 8th inning, and everyone would sort of kick back and relax and wait for Auto-Awesome to kick in? Those days are gone. (I feel like I should start singing "Dust In The Wind" or something.) Now it seems like everyone just covers their eyes and braces for impact when the door to the 'pen opens.

The All-Star break could not come at a more opportune time.

Congratulations to all seven Red Sox players who made the 2008 All-Star team - either by fan vote or player vote:

Kevin Youkilis - 1B
Dustin Pedroia - 2B
Manny Ramirez - OF
J.D. Drew - OF
Jason Varitek - C
David Ortiz - DH
Jonathan Papelbon - RP

With those (heartfelt) congrats out of the way, I can now get to the serious business. Namely:

(1) Chuckling at the fact that there are only three Yankees on the roster in their own stadium (and, more importantly, that Girardi's begging didn't land Mike Mussina a roster spot). This is petty and juvenile and slightly ridiculous of me, but I cannot help it. It's funny. Also: four Texas Rangers on the roster! And, again, only three Yankees! Still funny!

(2) Pissing off all of my readers who are Varitek fans... because I flat out don't believe he has played All-Star caliber baseball this year. He is a fantastic leader, a great game caller, and a pretty amazing dude. He's been an integral part of the Sox championships, and absolutely deserves the "C" on his chest. But so long as All-Star Team selection is still (wrongly) used by HOF voters when deciding whether to put a player in Cooperstown, a .218/.300/.358 stat line should not earn you a spot in the ASG. That's a .658 OPS! No, just... no.

If, however, the All-Star selections were treated by voters (and sportswriters and commentators) like the popularity contest/career reward they actually are, I would have absolutely no problem with the public and the players voting Wally, Raymond, the Phanatic and Mr. Met onto the All-Star Team. Sadly, with the likes of Joe Morgan and Tim McCarver around, I have a feeling it will be awhile before that happens.

Every Tuesday, I'll post a discussion topic or question for everyone to think about and then discuss in the comments section. Tuesday is always one of the most difficult days of the week to get through - you don't have the afterglow of the previous weekend's fun any more, and yet you're still days away from the next weekend. This should give us something fun to do to pass the time.

Tuesday Curveball - Week Eight It's been awhile since we've had one of these, but I thought it was time to kick them off again. With the July 31st trade deadline fast approaching, there have been rumors that the Red Sox front office has taken a look at adding Barry Bonds to the roster. Would you want Bonda to join the Red Sox- and why (or why not)?

As always, you don't have to be a fan of the Red Sox to get in on the discussion. All baseball fans- even Yankee fans- are welcome.

Another addition to the Red Sox Baby Album, courtesy of Topps baseball cards:

Per the Orlando Sentinel:

Starting on July 1, fans who purchase MLB themed Team Baby Entertainment titles at Toys R' Us or Babies R' Us will receive the limited edition Topps baby card packaged with the DVD.

An all star list of MLB players have signed on to have their baby portraits plastered on these new collectible Topps Cards, which are only being made available at Toys R' Us and Babies R' Us in limited quantities. In New York, fans who purchase the New York Yankees Baby or the New York Mets Baby DVD will also get the exclusive cards featuring Johnny Damon and David Wright respectively. Fans of the World Series Championship team, the Red Sox, will also get a Topps card with David Ortiz (image attached) as a "Little Papi" when they purchase the Red Sox Baby DVD. Last but not least, the newest Team Baby title, the L.A. Dodgers Baby DVD will be released in August and will include a card featuring a babyface Russ Martin.

hat tip: Ian at Sox & Dawgs

Joe Posnanski is a fantastic baseball writer and a brilliant student of the game. But that's not why I love Joe today. The reason I love Joe today is that he has brought the awesomeness of a new dastardly villain into my life.

Quake in fear, friends, as you behold the evil of... DR. STAT!

Apparently, the Devil Rays decided that the biggest scourge facing baseball today isn't steroids, or inflated salaries, or the designated hitter, or even Joe Morgan. The horror against which the Rays and their manager must fight is statistics. BOO, numbers! And rational thought! And logic! And the absence of hyperbole!

Naturally, they made a cartoon about it. Of course they did.

[I]t's a cartoon where the Tampa Bay Rays are superheroes. Yeah. I wasn't able to get the entire plot line, but apparently Joe Maddon is some sort of superhero mastermind, kind of like a baseball superhero Charlie, and he has the power to turn his Rays players into superheroes. One becomes really fast -- so fast his feet look like a tornado. One I guess can throw stuff at bad guys -- sort of a Roger Clemens for kids. The other one seems to be able to destroy bad guys by hitting them with a bat. Good lesson for the kids.

But, believe it or not, that's not the hilarious part. No, the hilarious part is this: The villain they were trying to catch was someone named "Dr. Stat." No, really. It seems that Dr. Stat -- and I'm quoting from the cartoon now -- wants to "use his knowledge of useless statistics to destroy the game." [...] He says as punishment he will point his stat ray direction at Tropicana Field in order to make it impossible for people to enjoy the games.

OK, timeout here -- what is a stat ray? How would that work? I should ask the guys at Baseball Prospectus if they have one. A stat ray. How great is that? I wonder what would happen if we would point the stat ray at some of my baseball writing friends. I'd love to aim it at my buddy Rick Morrissey up in Chicago, just to see what happened. Would he explode? Would he start talking about VORP and Eqa? I need to get me one of them

Catching up on the randomness of the last few days...

The very awesome Dan at Red Sox Monster has apparently gotten in the good graces of the folks who are making the Kevin Youkilis SlumpBuster energy drink, and they gave him an exclusive look at the new, redesigned can (which will go on-sale online tomorrow). I notice that SlumpBuster wisely decided that a half-naked girl and the slogan "TAKE ONE DOWN" didn't exactly go over well with a lot of folks. Don't try to distract us with a shiny, new can, Youk! We already know the real story on this, thanks to Mark Grace.

For reference, a before and after below:

 

Happy Fun Pitching Change Time! Justin Masterson is back with the AAA PawSox so that he can be molded into a relief pitcher... and hopefully help spell the ailing (and/or failing) bullpen. At the same time, Clay Buchholz will be returning to the Big Boy Sox to take back a starting spot in the rotation-- and will pitch tomorrow night against the Orioles.

And if you've ever wanted to cram yourself into a giant, swelteringly-hot green fur costume and dance around for the amusement of yadoods and screaming children, then the Red Sox have the job for you! The dubious honor of becoming Wally the green monster. Of course, you'd still have a long way to go before you could rack up a drunken party record like Mr. Met.

Hat tip: Sox & Dawgs!

News Flash! Connecticut Folks Overreact!

Some kids in Greenwich, deep in the heart of Yankee territory, decided to build a wiffle ball field in tribute to Fenway Park. And, naturally, the easygoing and laid-back denizens of that fine city decided to sue them. Of course they did!

I think the lawsuit is the least of their problems - take a look at that field. Who knew Fenway had Green Monster in center field?

It's good to know that the Red Sox find ways of keeping themselves amused when things get boring on the diamond. Namely, they like to talk on the phone. It's like a scene from Bye Bye Birdie out there lately, a regular "Telephone Hour".

On Monday night, Mike Lowell chased a routine fly ball out near the stands along the third baseline... and decided while he was there he might as well steal away a fan's cell phone he saw sitting on the top of the short wall, and carry it back with him onto the field. From Dan Roche:

"I always just look to see if there's like peanuts or nachos... and no one ever on the third base side... I think they banned like nachos, peanuts and popcorn there... because no one ever eats them," Lowell said.

"I kinda just want to take one from them to see their reaction. I guess a cell phone could have been good. If it was his wallet it would have been better."

"If it was his wallet I would have kept it in my pocket until the end of the game and then I would have given it back to him. I think that one would have been good."

And then during last night's game, Manny Ramirez took another patented Manny Being Manny scoreboard break in the Green Monster -- and took the opportunity to make a phone call during a pitching change in the sixth inning.

I can't wait for the day that Dustin Pedroia tells the pitcher to hold up for a minute and wait while he takes a very important cell phone call out at second base.

Congratulations go out to Jon Lester, who revealed to Dan Roche tonight on WBZ (from Beckett Bowl out in Malden) that he got engaged yesterday to his girlfriend of more than a year, Farah Johnson.

Here's video of Jon talking about Beckett Bowl and his engagement - he just can't keep the goofy grin off his face.

Through a great stroke of luck and generosity, sports watercolorist extraordinaire (and West Boylston-ite) Mark Waitkus has given me a print of one of his most recent watercolors commemorating the 2007 World Championship and banner unveiling at Fenway -- all so that I can give it away to one lucky reader!

I'm a big fan of Mark's work, so naturally I'm super excited he offered to let me give away one of his prints. His online studio showcases Red Sox prints, but also prints commemorating the Boston Marathon, the Patriots and the Celtics '08 championship... and you can buy all of those there direct from him.

The print I'm fortunate enough to give away is gorgeous - it's 11x16, and comes wrapped in plastic and sealed with an MLB hologram. It's also in my hot little hands, and ready to be sent out to a deserving Sox fan.

So here's the deal: after seeing the success of the recent contest at my other home, Babes Loves Baseball, I've decided to do something similar to give away Mark's gorgeous watercolor print.

HOW TO WIN: Email me a picture of yourself at a Red Sox game - Fenway Park or on the road. Can be from when you were little, or last weekend. Can be just you, or you and a bunch of friends or family. Whatever photo you think exhibits your love of the game and the team the best -- just nothing vulgar, and make sure you're in the shot somewhere.

WHO WINS: The neatest photo? Wins the Waitkus print. Yes, I realize "neatest" is vague - it's deliberately so. I have a feeling I'm going to get all kinds of cool photos from my awesome readers... so I want to leave the criteria open.

DEADLINE: July 25th, two weeks from today.

QUESTIONS: I'm a little flexible on what photos can be entered - I just want to avoid shots of just the ballpark or just the players. If you want to know if your photo will work, you can post in the comments or send me an email.

And don't be shy - I won't share names and email addresses... and the coolest photos will be featured here as well. So get creative!

If the fantastic work showcased at Mark's online studio wasn't enough to convert you to a fan, how about some of these tidbits about the artist?

He studied at Worcester Technical Institute and Worcester Art Museum - he's local!

Mark's ties with the Red Sox started via Baltimore back in 1991 -- when he painted the Baltimore Orioles' last game at Memorial Stadium for (now Sox VP) Dr. Charles Steinberg -- and his paintings now hang throughout Fenway's executive offices and luxury suites.

He was commissioned to do watercolors of Tony Gwynn and Cal Ripken Jr., which were featured as part of their induction ceremonies into Cooperstown last year.

Mark even painted the commemorative home plate for Major League Baseball's All-Star Game last year. The plate, with its rendering of San Francisco's AT&T Park, was used for the ceremonial first pitch by Giants legend Willie Mays.

Coolest of all? He's a descendent of Eddie Waitkus, the Cambridge-born baseball player who inspired the movie, "The Natural".